When it comes to dealing with my mental illness. Honesty is truly the best policy. I have decided to start right now.
The first thing anyone should know about me is my labels.
1. Depression
2. Anxiety
3. PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder)
4. OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder)
Though these are just labels to someone who has no clue what they mean in my life, they are indeed a personal hell.
What these labels mean to me
1. I hurt, deeply. To my soul, deeply. Expressing this hurt is very hard to do. What hurts? Why does it hurt?
2. I am uncomfortable. I feel fearful. I can't breathe.
Why do you feel this way? What is making you feel this?
3. Sudden thoughts of wanting to run away. Loud noises, screaming, fighting, I can't hang. Searching for exits.
Why?
4. A place for everything and everything in it's place. Bleaching EVERYTHING! Don't touch my stuff! NO not there! Don't wait, get it done NOW! Count. Count everything.
WHY? Again why?
Here's some truths.
1. I am covered in tattoos. I can't control much, but I can control my body and what it looks like.
2. I suffer from mental illness.
3. I tried to commit suicide 6 months ago for the 3rd time in my life. If my husband hadn't come home early, I would have succeeded.
Again WHY?
